January 1, 2013

Top 5 Ways to Tell If A Guy Is Great In Bed Without Sleeping With Him

1.  He's Bowlegged - It is scientifically proven by urban scholars that if a man is bowlegged he makes for a great back shot and bedroom lover.  IDK what it is - but I know there is truth in this theory (or so i've heard).

2.  He Never Brags - Men that don't hold regular press parties for their lingham capabilities are known to be a great lay.  They operate by actions and live for the opportunity when they can show you much more than they can tell.

3.  He's A Chocolate Drop - Everybody knows a dark skin brother is always a sure hit.  The darker they are, the more biologically connected they are to their primal African roots.  Chocolate brothers go after the gold - no questions asked.  If you lay with this man, your dainty No's, Dont's and Stops are worthless.  If anything, he may tell you to shut the hell up and turn around - hopefully you like that type of thing.  Don't say I didn't warn you.


4.  He Has Smushy Lips - Men with a certain grade of lip have been known to be great lovers.  The texture can only be confirmed by another set of lips pressed against it.  It's soft, moisturized, firm yet smushy.  These guys are also known to give great head.  I am convinced there is no greater lip moisturizer than croch juice - they need to bottle it and sell it for those of you who lack.  (LOL at all the men licking their lips trying to see if they're smushy...HA)

5. He Knows Your Erogenous Zones - Call him Slick Rick because he knows the triggers to touch in order to moisten your panties.  His tactics are descreet yet they pack a serious punch!  It's like he knows you - but he doesn't.  These guys are dangerous.  If the two of you are fully clothed baking cookies for the church bake sale and with one touch he can have your mind in the gutter in less than .02 seconds - imagine what he can do if he had you to himself.  Good Lawd!

Happy Hunting Ladies!


2 comments:

  1. Hey! This must com from some real experiments

    ReplyDelete
  2. Could come from primary or secondary sources. However, a Single Black Woman never tells - duh!

    ReplyDelete